Monday, February 14, 2005

Dance with me



Last night, I danced with you, my little arbutus and how beautiful it was. Now I feel you are coming to be with me even when you are somewhere else. I don’t want to think of you as an object which is going to fill my loneliness - I have already shared that with your dad - but I think, you are going to complete the equation of my mission in this world…
Believe it or not, I was unfinished before you and it doesn’t mean I need you to be with me all the time; albeit it means: you are going to be part of me all the time in this life.
So let us dance together day and night with the lovely rhythm of the universe.

Farhad Sadeghi (Miniatur)

Sunday, January 23, 2005

The Big Trade

Let us swap places:
Yours is simple, straight
Mine is complicated,
You have only one task to do: Growing fast;
I have lot of ideas and imaginations that make my actions,
You know where you are from, you are still in contact with it,
I am even doubtful about my source.
You know what exactly your mission is
I have forgotten it long time ago.

And now, what do you think, ready for an exchange?
Or you shall have my situation in a near future?
Can I offer you to be my Mom, so I’ll be your babe?
And I stay in a safe place surrounded by a pleasant juice,
Listening to your heart beats,
which is pumping love mixed with blood all over my world, feeding me enough
To grow fast, that is my main and only task
And thinking to myself: how weird my mom’s world is.

Saturday, January 08, 2005

The Commencement of Discourse

Now you start to communicate with me.
I am listening to my favorite Roger Waters’ song (Amused to death) and you are punching me in resonance with rhythm of the music.
natalie Croiset
We can consider it as a climax and we should think our joined-curves must ascend in a new era. You are listening to me, so I have to listen to you backward… This is what we describe as “Discourse”.

Monday, January 03, 2005

A strange dream by your act.

Last night you, my little arbutus, jumped to my dream and started a difficult conversation with me. You asked me about “the meaning of the life”. I was so surprise cause you spoke like an adult. Actually, you were an adult but you called me “mom” and that’s why I understood you might be my baby not a stranger. And the difficult part was that: You were a well grown male behaving like a gentleman. Oh god! It was a complicated situation. I had different paradoxical feelings because I was somehow conscious and I knew this must be a special dream. I knew you were trying to draw my attention to something important, something beyond our philosophical conversation, but I could not stop thinking about you yourself, at the same time. I thought in parallel:
This is my baby, he is a boy.
He is so big, how could he be my baby?
How serious he is, I cannot even touch him.
I know him from somewhere but I cannot remember.

And while I was thinking like these, you continued: “…look at these innocent people in Tsunami, what was the meaning of their lives?”
Unfortunately, I cannot remember my dialogue. I even cannot remember the details of our discussion any more, but I think your questions are my own unfinished interrogation, which I have to finish it before your birth.

Sunday, December 26, 2004

Marry Christmass.

This is our first Christmas all together. Because of a little bleeding, your physician ordered me to rest at home, so we are going to have a lot of time together.
I counted it as your first Christmas but you may forget it just after your arrival to this world. You may also forget these moments we spent together. I’ll try to write them down as a short note, so in future you may remember them. But this is all I can do and I know there are lots of things you will forget soon after your birth and I can’t remind you them cause I don’t know them myself. If you had different previous lives, you will forget them too. But you don’t need retain them, and I don’t need to think about your previous lives, cause we both need to focus on your new life.
So Marry First Christmas my little Arbutus and have a long life filled with joys of the first things.

Tuesday, December 21, 2004

A short short story.

Last night was the last night of the fall and it was the longest night of the year.
In our country we usually celebrate this day and we call it Yalda. Our ancestors believed in the end of this night, Darkness would be defeated by the light (Sun) and from this time ahead, days would be longer.

Last night I was alone with you, and I thought if it was the longest night and after that it would be the more light, so I would be better with no back pain and no dizziness.
"And because of longer days in front of us, we will have more light so my little Arbutus and I both together, will know each other better than before and we will enjoy our companion." I thought to myself.
Now this is your turn. Show me something. Let me feel you not as a pain inside me but as an individual who can share feeling with me.
"Do you like this story? So give a response. I'm waiting..."

Sunday, December 19, 2004

In your Sixteenth!

You are something like this:


You have nose, you have eyes;
you have lips even cheeks
You can open your mouth;
Oh you must be so beautiful
And these are some of your scientific specifications:

Sixteenth Week

  • Bones are clearly visible in ultrasound images.
  • The ears stand out from the head.
  • The appearance is human. The eyes face anteriorly. The ears have almost reached their final position on the sides of the head.
  • Fine palm lines have formed, which can be used to permanently identify the fetus. Finger, palm, and footprints are never duplicated among individuals.
*from the Science for unborn human life

Tuesday, December 14, 2004

A girl, or a boy?


http://www.zianet.com/showmain.idc

Who are you?
Are you a girl, or a boy?
Does it really matter?
Can I have a baby without a sex?
This is you who may claim.
Will you consider it in your future life?
Or you need to emphasize your sex -what ever it is-
To have a better position in your job,
With Better income,
Or more power in the society.
Some kind of relationship with a boy or a girl…

Although I think you need to a have a definite sex
My lovely no one baby
Your are not a Sir or a Princess yet
But you my sweet Arbutus any way.

Saturday, December 11, 2004

You are a chance?

Sometimes I think I find you by chance
You came to my world when I was desperate
I worked hard day to night and I thought,
this is the only way to live a life
You came and made me depressed
cause I thought you would change my life
from the bad to the worse
How could I work as hard as I did before?
How could I have my time as I had for my own?
How could I have baby when I not grew old in my heart?
But any way; you came
And first I thought I find you by a chance
And this would be a chance to change my life

Now I think something else:
How come if you find me by chance,
to change your life;
and mine too.

You Need a Name.

They say to me:
You shouldn't name the unborn baby. This may cause a misfortune.
But I need to call you something. I need to think about you by a name.
You, without a name are nothing to me, cause you're so small to show me your presence.
I will name you: Arbutus, don't ask me why;
I just think that you must be something like the fruit of this evergreen tree.


www.anisn.it